Saturday, June 3 2006, 14:26

She's lost it

John's just got all the music channels on HomeChoice. I'm loving it! Music videos are fab.

Has anyone seen the video to Madonna's song, Sorry? It's demented! It starts off with Madge and her girlz jumping into the back of a white van; every few seconds they drag a different male victim in with them, and the Queen of Pop grinds her leotard-clad booty up against them. Nice. Then we switch to some bizarre scene with Madonna and her girls in a big cage somewhere in da hood with crazy people shouting through the bars; Madonna goes on to defeat the gangsta types in some smackdown comp by just writhing on the floor in a costume that would make Jane Torville green with envy... and before we know it, we're in some seventies glama roller disco. That woman is on drugs...

But what's with all these eighties tracks making a comeback with an extra thousand beats per minute? It's fabulous. For those of you who loved St Elmo's Fire, there's a new version by John Parr vs Tommyknockers, and remember the Coca Cola song - The First Time by Robin Beck? That's back with a typical dance music video featuring loads of semi-naked girls kissing each other and showing just what happens if you're not wearing a sports bra... (here on youtube.com).

My favourite though, is the new Fatboy Slim video for his cover of The Joker. If you can't bear to see loads of cute kittens dressed up or spinning on turntables, don't go here!

Sunday, June 4 2006, 23:55

If you go down to the woods today...

This weekend has been the best weather in ages - blue skies and lots of sun. Twenty-one degrees today! Last weekend was another matter.

For the bank holiday, I went with John and his friends down to the south coast, in Hampshire, to the now inaccurately titled New Forest. It was surprisingly quick to get to, and we were very pleased with our "economy" chalets, which were certainly comfortable enough, and even more comfortable once we'd broken out the gin and tonic. We spent our first night in, acquainting the crew with Articulate, a prince among board games.

This kind of set the pace for the whole weekend... I had a near brush with exercise when I went to see about using the gym, but I was told there weren't any induction slots left all weekend! Other than that, a gentle stroll through the woods was probably as tiring as it got, since Nayanee was kind enough to ferry us around every day.

I definitely enjoyed our last day the most. We went to Beaulieu and spent the morning wandering around the castle and abbey, and (to the amusement of John and his mates) I snapped every bit of rock and foliage in sight. But the highlight was yet to come, and unfortunately half of us missed it. Only John, Nayanee, and I elected to stay behind and go to the Otter and Owl Centre, while the others started for home. Dull as it may sound, the Centre was a rare treat. Anyone who's grown up with a literary diet of The Wind in the Willows, Watership Down, Beatrix Potter, or even The Animals of Farthing Wood will instinctively be familiar with rabbits and weasels, mice and badgers, foxes and otters and other soft woodland animals. But how many of those things have you ever actually seen in the flesh? Precious few, if you're like me - and I once played Badger in Supertoad (a musical version of Willows)! ;) A couple of hours sped by while we were in there, and we all really enjoyed it. But it was damp and freezing, and it was a slight relief to pile into the warm car and begin the journey home.

Get a vicarious fix of soft, huggable forest creatures from the pictures from the New Forest

Tuesday, June 6 2006, 10:09

Apocalypse now!

Well it turned out nice again, didn't it? When I looked out of the bathroom this morning, the Thames was still decidely watery - no rivers of fire in sight. The weather looks set for sunny - a high of sixteen and a low of eight; there's no mention of it raining fire and brimstone, which is just as well because I left my umbrella on the Tube some time ago!

I'm kind of banking on Armageddon being a bit of a damp squib to be honest, because I ordered some new undies from aussieBum on Sunday - it would be a shame if the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse got their hands on me before I got to try them on. Admittedly, we still have another fourteen hours to go before 6/6/06 is over, and anything could happen. It would be very disappointing if tonight's dinner plans were upset, although for all I know, the Last Battle Between Good and Evil kicks off in John's kitchen...

On the off chance that Pope Palpatine Benedict and his Godsquad are right, here's a final farewell to everyone I know - well, my subscribers at least: you're the ones I really care about ;)

Tuesday, June 6 2006, 11:59

If we make it through to tomorrow...

...and I have every confidence that we will actually. I was just on the phone to James in Sydney, and he didn't mention the Host of Heaven doing battle with Satan's hordes of demons, and he's not the sort to keep a celestial battle under his hat if he's heard of one. Having said that, I'm not sure how these things work - would the Apocalypse only happen on 6/6/06 for us in the UK (being at the centre of time, and all)? I suppose that as long as it starts at midday here, then it'll be the same date everywhere, won't it? Oh hang on, we're on Summer Time now, so that would be 11am. I'm sure at least one of my friends Down Under would text me to let me know if the world had started ending over there, and I'm sure there'd be something on BBC. Hm.

Anyway, if we make it through to tomorrow, you really should pick up a copy of The Time Traveller's Wife by Audrey Niffeneger. I haven't finished it yet, but it's really very good. There's a review here at amazon.com. You should check it out. I'm sure it's better than any of Dan Brown's cringeworthy prose ;)

Thursday, June 22 2006, 17:30

Personal Bests, Pimms, and Prices

Well, Armageddon came and went, and the only thing worth noting was the release of the new Omen remake, which I haven't seen. A few days later marked a very special occasion - six whole weeks of not going out clubbing! Incredible, and an all-new PB. Of course, I celebrated in the only way I know how: clubbing! It coincided with the arrival of Sam, a friend of mine from Sydney (just for a change); he was on his way back to Australia after a successful rugby tour in New York with the Sydney Convicts and having a bit of a world tour at the same time. Since he'd been to London a couple of times before, he wasn't really interested in sightseeing, so celebrating my six week record appropriately resulted in an orgy of hedonism - well, two nights out clubbing in a row. Slightly tiring, but great fun - and we wrapped up the weekend with a picnic in Greenwich Park in the sunshine on the Sunday.

To continue the summer theme, we had a Pimm's party the following Friday, and for no good reason, we made it a Pink & Pimm's party - it was very amusing to see what pink items people had in their wardrobes - although a few people actually bought some choice new items specially (including me). It seemed to me that we hadn't had a party in ages, and maybe that's why this one was especially popular - we were out of lemonade all too quickly.

This weekend has been completely party free - John and I went down to Hereford to visit my family, affording them the perfect opportunity to shower me with early birthday gifts - an opportunity that was sadly not taken advantage of ;) Nevertheless, I got to meet my new niece, Amy, who appears to be a very sweet-tempered young lady who smiles a lot; she also dribbles a fair bit, but I assume this will pass in the fulness of time. It was great to catch up with everyone, and John seemed to survive the total Price family immersion too, so it was a great weekend all in all - and I've brought back a pile of stuff to stick on eBay as well - I can't wait!

Fun footnote to end with... playing on my iPod at the moment is Pete Waterman's ironically titled The Hit Factory, and Donna Summer's unspeakable This Time I Know It's For Real is the track setting my toes tapping. If you dare to watch the video on YouTube.com, you'll see big hats, big hair, some fancy footwork in fierce boots that kicks Wacko Jacko's Moonwalk into touch, and (above all) some frenetic background pyrotechnics that probably started the epilepsy warning lobby for strobe lighting. Enjoy.